Monday, May 23, 2011

may.22.2011



 I apologize ahead of time        for  all   the

photographs that have               never
                                                been written



for the limbs


we talk about           frequently
bcuz
we have a lot of them
&
they can’t distinguish each other

little categories, sure         
but just
blowing into empty space
           
            slowly

& it’s been a           very
                                    complicated
                               relationship

with my
                                                anything really weighing

on my
                                    last time i honestly can’t

really start meeting folks,    how i relate to mine

the only way     i can     ever      really         see you
           
            through displacement,

you, or glasses of old cabernet
you, or windows with dirty hand signals
you: (a little bit) tricky long-distance
from/manipulation/or/that time we knew about walking home

i would sleep
                        /if i were     something else/
stop being fooled by
                        constant breathing
so i could
  harness
my
    peripheries
in getting lost
                            if i could just be
                            OK
                            and
                            sleepy

but instead,
i am not moving at all until
the week before i am                comfortable,

since there are things          i just can’t say,

but what if i just    deep down
remove the     years ago parts,
            and remember the good fortune
            standing between us
            and what it looks like
            to be a daughter
            when i finally think i can
            stick my hearing around
            the corners of your mailbox
            or tell you about
            the risk of changing topics
            or
            the fucking conversations
            you might compare me to
            if my ears became bobcats
            and i stopped saying thank you




but first, i wanted to
                        get all this down,

so i took my right leg

and then i took my left one
then my right



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